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Do you feel like you are about to lose your sanity as you are trying to help your kid find their path? Is the war of the ages playing out in your household as you navigate the battlegrounds of relationships, finance, and the college application process?
Nancy Berk Ph.D, joined Mom of Many Hats Radio to share her funny, but informative take on helping your kid get into college without losing your savings, your relationship, or your mind. Having gone through the process twice herself, and having the insight of a therapist AND college professor, Nancy’s comedic approach and explanation of the process is sure to put a grin on your face and lighten the dark night of the college prep experience. She shared her humor and her expertise with us on Mom of Many Hats Radio!
Getting our kids off to college is a learning curve. Even if we have more than one child and have gone through the process before, we are still stressed about the process. Dr. Nancy Berk advises us about how we can manage that stress. She gave us the following tips:
We should realize that there is more than one perfect place for our child – and to remind our child of that. If we or our kids think that there is a single perfect place, we are setting ourselves up for disaster.
As parents, we have anxiety about our kids taking their SATs and ACTs, but our kids have just as much or even more. We need to relax and contain our anxiety to help them through it.
As parents we have dreams about where and what they should be, but in reality, it is their dream, not ours. As parents we need to back off and for the most part let them drive the process
We need to understand and see where we need to direct, push and pull a bit to keep the process going – our life experience and management skills can help them meet deadlines. But, our children will be successful in the process if we allow them to drive the process, write their own essays, and do some of the problem solving and investigating in the process.
What we can do as parents is work with our kids strengths and weaknesses to help them find the right place, maintain a good relationship with them, and maintain some of our savings.
To listen to the entire broadcast, click the listening link above.
Do you dread those tough conversations with your kids? What kinds of conversations are hard for you as a parent to have with your kids? What conversations are tough and uncomfortable for your kids to hear?
Sometimes it’s difficult to sit our kids down and have frank discussion about things they may encounter in life. We feel self conscious, uncomfortable, and even maybe a bit embarrassed when we are faced with having the conversations with our kids about sex. We may think that our kids would never have a need to know about the dangers of alcohol and drugs. We may think that our kids are on the right path and don’t need a lot of direct conversation about things that happen in life and the choices they will face – and of the consequences of both.
Tamra Wade of PaperHopeBlog joined Mom of Many Hats Radio to talk about the discussions we must be having with our kids. She shared with us personal stories about the types of conversations she has had with her daughters, how she has approached them, and how they have played out. Through her blog a collection of writings and stories from her own life as a teen, she shares her journal entries from her angst filled teenage years as a source of conversation for other moms and daughters to base tough conversations around. Through the use of these stories, parents and kids have a safe and neutral place to talk about the situations and decisions that kids will face in their lives.
Although as parents we often feel uncomfortable about starting the conversations, we must get past our own discomfort and have frank and honest conversations with our kids. In today’s world our kids are facing the same things that we did when we were their age, but it comes at them so much faster and furiously due to technology. For that reason, we need to be proactive and have the tough discussions with them. Tamra gave us these tips on how to do that:
Set a Good Environment – Choose a time, a place and an environment that is going to be free of other distractions or siblings that may interfere with the conversation.
Share Stories – People relate to stories that are similar to what they are going through. Sharing a story helps to make the other person feel like they are not alone in a situation or decision. It provides a safe place and a conversation starter.
Ask Open Ended Questions – Open ended questions require more than just a yes or no answer. They encourage discussion and keep the conversation flowing.
If you would like to know more about how to have tough conversations with your children, visit Tamra’s site PaperHopeBlog. To listen to the broadcast of this show, click HERE To listen to broadcasts from any of the Mom of Many Hats Radio Shows, click HERE . To take Mom of Many Hats Radio with you where ever you go – get the FREE ITUNES downloads my clicking the PODCAST GAL on the side bar!
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